Thursday, April 23, 2009

Happiness !

You know what kills happiness?
Expectations.
Give it a thought and you will realise that you tend to lose your happy composure when your expectations get belied..by a person or a circumstance or pretty often, by you yourself..
The other person in your life becomes unhappy when you are found in a happy mood with some one else..can't accept that some one else should be able to make you feel so good..you are expected to derive all your happiness from just one source and when it comes from any where else, it is just and sheer 'adultery'..
We need to learn to have little or as little as possible expectations from people and places, circumstances and instances, most especially from the most expected sources!
And we also need to learn to tone down our expressions of happiness in the presence of certain people, lest we arouse a suspicion that some 'hanky panky' is on (in the mind/s of he/she/they) --learn to enjoy from within..learn to fill up to our heart's desire and be happy but never 'fart' ( what an ugly expression to use!) to give away that we have had so much..
Am in a hurry but will try to carry on with this one, asap..

Today!

Today kept thinking about yesterday ! Was the birthday of a very dear and yet, presently estranged friend ..the last I visited that house was on the last birthday and I felt some what distanced..then came my birthday..got a call..happy birthday..shall I see you soon..oh sure..but that never happenend..no communication in the mean time..neither from this side nor from that..what goes wrong with us..difficult to put a finger to it..but some thing sure happens and we are transformed into being what we essentially are not..at least thats what I believe..we become unsure, we turn critical and we seem to erase all that history of a relationship ( any positive relationship, not only the so called 'relationship') and become an egoistic-cum-egotistic cock tail while we still continue to believe that we are so very considerate and regardful, so very happy to hear what the other has to say and eager to understand and then communicate that understanding in our dialogues and conversations..but what happens when we cease to communicate and there are neither any dialogues, not even monologues, as we, part unwittingly and part deliberately take recourse to a course that shuts out thought and thoughtfulness and drags us to a kind of self righteous aloofness...we lament the lack of 'life' in our lives but don't want to change the course of our thought and action because we feel, we have been wronged here or there, and we fail to notice that with this revenge of alienation, we are now committing a self goal.
You tell me, is there a way out which will enable us to be blind to the wrongs and hurts, betrayals and outbursts, so that the relationship survives all that choking and beating ...and possibly, the survival will do the trick in the course of time and never shall we feel fretful and depressed (almost distressed) about these estrangements (reasoned or just plain stupid !)..